PARENT READING LIST

Dear parents,

Here is a list of books compiled for parents, as well as a few books for children. It is not meant to be comprehensive but simply offers a list of books that you can review. Some I have “discovered” and some were recommended by colleagues. I have not read all the books in the list. This list includes books that in my view are most relevant to parents of children experiencing difficulties, although I do not agree with everything they recommend. In some cases, I have written a brief comment. You, as a parent, may decide whether any of these readings are relevant to your specifics needs. Some have brief comments, not necessarily mine.

Daniel Pilowsky, MD

 

General Parenting

  1. Pride and Joy – A Guide to Understanding Your Child’s Emotions and Solving Family Problems, by Kenneth Barish, Oxford University Press, 2012.

    Comment: Excellent review of emotional aspects of child development, and of ways of dealing with common problems in children.
  1. All That She Can Be – A Guide to Help Parents Understand and Cope with Their Adolescent Girl’s Development. By Carol Eagle. Simon & Schuster, 1993. 
  1. The Emotional Life of the Toddler by Alicia Lieberman.

    Comment: Parents of toddlers find it really helpful.
  1. Playful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen (Ballantine Books, 2001).  Emphasizes the many benefits of play, and help parents join kids “in their world.” 
  1. 1-2-3 Magic  by Thomas W. Phelan.
    Comment: A book parents like a lot, for common discipline issues with younger children.  It offers a behavioral approach. It is especially helpful for parents who try to get their young children to agree with their rules, and get involved in endless negotiations.
    Unfortunately, the author does not give enough attention to the emotional development of children.
  1. Parenting from the Inside Out: How a Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive 
    by Daniel J. Siegel and Mary Hartzell, Penguin: New York 2004.

    Comment: For parents interested in reflecting on how the deeper issues in their own life relate to their current parenting style. It is a book intended to increase reflective functioning.  Chapters are followed by descriptions of very specific activities parents can do to this end.
  1. The Self-Esteem Trap by Polly Young-Eisendrath, Ph.D.
  1. Spoiling Childhood by Diane Ehrensalt, Ph.D.
  1. The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness by Edward Hallowell, Ph.D.
  1. Raising Resilient Children by Robert Brooks, Ph.D.
  1. Nurturing Good Children Now by Ron Taffel, Ph.D.
  1. Good Friends are Hard to Find: Help your Child Find, Make, and Keep Friends. Frankel & Wetmore.
  1. Between Parent and Child. Ginott H (1965). New York: Three Rivers Press.
  1. The Magic of Encouragement: Nurturing Your Child’s Self Esteem. Marston, S. (1990). New York: William Morrow and Company.
  1. Playground Politics. Greenspan, S. (1993).  Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley
  1. The Challenging Child. Greenspan, S. (1995).  Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.
  1. The Growth of the Mind and the Endangered Origins of Intelligence. Greenspan, S. (1997). Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.
    Comment: Dr. Greenspan describes insights gained from his work with autistic children, and he extends his ideas about child development to other social problems.
  1. The Heart of Parenting.  Gottmann, J. M. (1997).  NY: Simon & Schuster.
    Comment: In this book, John Gottman presents his important research on family communication and “emotion coaching.
  1.  Parenting on Behalf of the Child. Dix, T. (1992). In I. Siegel (Ed.)
  1. Parental Belief Systems: The Psychological Consequences for Children. Hillsdale, NJ: L. Erlbaum Associates.
    Comment: This academic book chapter presents a helpful framework for understanding the dilemmas faced by parents in trying to balance empathy and firmness in our relationships with our children.
  1. The Whole Brain Child Dan Siegel.

ADD/ADHD

  1. Teenagers with ADD and ADHD: A Guide for Parents and Professionals by Chris A. Zeigler Dendy.

    Comment: It is readable and practical.
  1. You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy? by Kate Kelly, Peggy Ramundo & Edward Hallowell.

    Comment: Although it is aimed at adults, it’s very helpful to teens and their parents for understanding and building strategies.
  1. My Brother’s a World Class Pain by Michael Gordon. GSI Publications, Dewitt, NY
  1. Putting On The Brakes by Patricia Quinn and Judity Stern.
  1. Otto Learns About His Medicine by Matthew Galvin.
  1. Super-parenting for ADD. Hallowell, E.M. and Jensen, P. (2010). New York: Ballantine Books.
    Comment: Hallowell and Jensen write about the need to appreciate the “gifts,” not just the deficits and difficulties, of living with ADD and emphasize the importance of empathy and positive parenting.

Children with Special Needs and their Siblings

  1. The Child with Special Needs – Encouraging Intellectual and Emotional Growth by Stanley Greenspan, Ph.D. and Serena Wieder, Ph.D.
  1. What about me? Growing up with a developmentally disabled sibling, by Bryna Siegel and Stuart Silverstein
  1. The Normal One: Life with a Difficult or Damaged Sibling. Jeanne Safer

Anxiety and Depression

  1. Helping Your Anxious Child: A Step-by-Step Guide for Parents. Rapee, Spence, Cobham, Wignall.
  1. Worried No More: Help and Hope for Anxious Children, 2nd edition. Aureen P Wagner.
  1. The Silence Within: A Teacher/Parent Guide to Working with Selectively Mute and Shy Children by Gail Kervatt.
  1. Monsters Under the Bed and Other Childhood Fears: Helping you Child Overcome Anxieties, Fears, and Phobias. Garber, Garber, & Spizman.
  1. Living With a Black Dog by Matthew Johnstone. Andrew McMeel Publishing, Kansas City, Missouri. (depression)
  1.  Freeing Your Child from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Chansky, Tamar (2000). New York: Random House.
  1.  Freeing Your Child from Anxiety. Chansky, Tamar (2004). Cambridge, MA: Da Capo Press.
  1. Freeing Your Child from Negative Thinking. Chansky, Tamar  (2008). Cambridge, MA: Da Capo Press.
    Comment: Helpful techniques, based on cognitive-behavioral research, for helping children with these problems.
  1.  Seligman, M. (1995). The Optimistic Child.  Boston: Houghton Mifflin.

Trauma, Grief and Loss

  1. Never the Same: Coming to Terms with the Death of a Parent by Donna Schuurman.
    Comment: This is a great resource.
  1. Losing a Parent to Death in the Early Years ” by Alicia Lieberman(2003 Zero to Three Press).
    Comment: It’s focused on traumatic bereavement as it affects young children.
  1. Brave Bart by Caroline Sheppard. Institute for Trauma and Loss in Children. Grosse Point, MI. (trauma and grief)
  1. Goodbye Chicken Little by Betsy Byars. HarperTrophy (HarperCollins), NYC. (grief: for older children)
  1. Rachel and the Upside Down Heart by Eileen Douglas. Price Stern Sloan, Los Angeles. (grief: for younger children)

Divorce

  1. Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way by M Gary Neuman.
Comment: This book acknowledges what kids feel as they deal with parental divorce.
  1. Mama and Daddy Bear’s Divorcee by CM Spelman (for young children)
  1. Through the Eyes of Children: Healing Stories for Children of Divorce by Janet J Johnson and colleagues.
  1. Growing up with Divorce by Neil Kalter(1990)., Free Press.
    Comment: Provides information on how children respond to divorce at each developmental stage

Step-Families

  1. How to Win as a Step Family (2nd Edition) by Emily B. Visher, Ph.D. and John S. Visher, M.D.
  1. The Not-So-Wicked Stepmother by Lizi Boyd. Puffin Books, NYC.
  1. Keys to Parenting your Anxious Child by Katherina Manassis (for step-fathers)

Defiant Behavior

  1. The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child. Kazdin, A. (2008). Boston: Houghton Mifflin.
  1. Minimizing Power Struggles: Understanding, Respecting, and Responding to Your Child’s Behavior. Schreiber, J. (2011).
    Comment: Excellent tips on avoiding power struggles with young children

Self-esteem and Eating Issues

  1. Real Kids Come In All Sizes: 10 Essential Lessons to Build Your Child’s Body Esteem by Kathy Kater. New York: Broadway Books(2004).
  1. Shapesville by Andy Mills and Becky Osborn. Gurze Books(2003).
    Comment: Book to read to children: An illustrated book about everyone coming in different sizes and shapes.
  1. Full Mouse Empty Mouse: A Tale of Food and Feelings by Dina Zeckhausen, PhD.  Washington, D.C.: Magination Press, 2008.
    Comment: Book to read to children

Tantrums

  1. No More Meltdowns. Baker, J. (2008). Arlington, TX: Future Horizons.
  1. The Explosive Child. Greene, R. W. (1998). NY: Harper Collins.

Learning

  1.  Overcoming Dyslexia. Shaywitz, S. (2003) New York: Knopf.
  1.  A Mind at a Time. Levine, M. (2002). New York: Simon and Shuster.
  1.  The Myth of Laziness. Levine, M. (2003). New York: Simon and Shuster.

Specific Issues

  1. The Out-Of-Sync Child by Carol Kranowitz (sensory integration disorder)
  1. The Difficult Child by Stanley Turecki (temperament difficulty)
  1. Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems by Richard Ferber.
  1. Freeing Your Child from Obsessional-Compulsive Disorder by Tamar Chansky.
  1. The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child by Alan Kazdin.
  1. The Explosive Child, Ross Greene
  1. Asperger’s Syndrome: A Guide for Parents and Professionals by Tony Attwood. Philadelphia: Jessica Kingsley Publishers, 1998 (Reprinted in later years).

    Comment: Very useful for parents, teachers and mental health professionals. In DSM-5 these children are included in the “Autism Spectrum Disorder” diagnostic category. However, this book remains relevant to parents of high functioning, verbal children in the autism spectrum. Available in English and several other languages.

Children’s Books

  1. Sammy the Elephant and Mr. Camel  by Joyce Mills and Richard Crowley. Magination Press (Brunner/Mazel, NY).(enuresis)
  1. I Don’t Know Why… I Guess I’m Shy. by Barbara Cain. Magination Press (Brunner/Mazel, NY). (shyness)
  1. Clouds and Clocks by Matthew Galvin. Magination Press (Brunner/Mazel, NY). (soiling) 
  1. You Can Call Me Willy by Matthew Galvin. Magination Press (Brunner/Mazel, NY). (AIDS)
  1. First Day Jitters Julie Danneberg and Judy ove
  1. Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes.
  1. Scary Night Visitors: A Story for Children with Bedtime Fears by Irene Wineman Marcus, Paul Marcus, & Susan Jesche (Illustrator).
    1.  Geraldine’s Blanket. Keller, H. (1984). New York: Greenwillow Books.
  1.  Gone Fishing. Long, E. R. (1987). Boston: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
    Comment: A brief picture book that beautifully captures the feelings of a young boy in his relationship with his father.

  1. My Grandmother’s Cookie Jar. Miller, M. (1987). Los Angeles: Price, Stern, Sloan, Inc.